No, it's not an advertisement for my expressio.ning.com website. Although I think it would have been fun to put that together and actually have it work...
No, this is a commentary on an eventful storm we had last night. Aug 28, 2K8 is the date, and WOW, never in my many years on the earth have I seen such a display of raw power. Hurricanes? Phooey! Tornados - you're getting warm. This thing was raucous, rowdy, unruly, and other ancient words describing utter violent chaos. It started around 8:00pm as many other monsoon-type storms. I looked to the south to see a very, VERY active cell approaching us. I didn't think it would get here as most of the storms we see off in the distance rarely get all the way to northeast Mesa. I think it was one of those storms that was destined to hit the populated parts of our state after gathering strength from the heat.
As the storm approached, the wind began to blow - much like most monsoon storms. No note taken. Then the lightning started - again, nothing too strange here. Then about 15 minutes into the storm I realized that it had begun to *flash* outside. No, not that kind of flashing. It looked more like the kind of flashing where Dianna runs to the car shielding her eyes and then speeds off in the Mercedes only to smash into the tunnel or where Brittany ensures that the angle is right before conspicuously flashes her cooch while stepping out of or into the car.
The flashing was so dramatic that I went outside to witness what was going on. The news today said that we experienced about 9,600 lightning strikes per hour - FOR TWO HOURS. It was spectacular. I promptly gathered my kids and a chair and went out on the porch and sat to watch God's fireworks. The lightning was almost exclusively cloud-to-cloud and the thunder was absolutely continuous. Not the earth shattering, bone-rattling, grandma's-marinated-pinto-and-green-chili-bean-casserole-fart rumbling, but certainly a constant 747 run-up engine roar that blanketed the night for two solid hours.
The weather-bot stuffed suit on Channel 10 explained that the clouds extended up some 40,000-50,000 feet above the ground. The amount of damage caused by the 85 mph winds was well-documented by the news media as they scoured the city proclaiming, “…see this construction sign, (that resembles a large metal flag on a large metal pole and acts in wind much like a windmill would) it was blown over, and it’s heavy…” Today must have been a slow news day. Senator McCain chose a VP running mate (Sarah Palin, mother of 5 and Alaskan governor) and it rained in Phoenix. What an unbelievable display, though. The VP and the lightning.
When I lived in Utah, going to school, I was awakened by a rather unique lightning storm. It was different than the storm described above – it was almost exclusively cloud to ground. This storm was interesting – not because it chose 3:00am to occur, but because it was so violent in nature. Unlike the constant rumbling, the thunder generated by this storm was every 2-3 seconds and would crackle like Eldon Tyrell’s head under the pressure of Roy Batty’s (Rutger Hauer) crushing force. Each strike would stab to the ground from relatively low clouds and the thunder would immediately pierce the night like fart in a hyperbaric chamber. Hmmm, another fart analogy. And analogy has anal right in it...
I kinda want to get back in the blogging mode. I think I will. This way I can dump out some more of my experiences and put a checkmark in the personal history column of my pathetic list of achievements. That checkmark will be lonely for a while since I am not doing much else. Opening day of Sun Devil football 2008 starts tomorrow. I look forward to it.
Facebook me – search Jeff Crandall. I'll be your friend. Good to be back.
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