Staycation Quotation

OK, so I have a real problem with the portmanteau "staycation." See what I did there? I replaced the part of the word with another word thus changing the meaning. It's a Frankenword. Staycations, if I can use that word from now on without quotations, are a reported way to save money by vacationing close to home. I think in some instances (certainly not my instance) it means to stay in the United States instead of vacationing abroad with a broad, senator.

The issue I have with staycations is that it conjures an image of sitting around my house unshowered in my underpants surfing the net, napping, or surfing the net. The image repulses me (though the activity is strangely alluring). I think it is unfair to call vacationing in another part of the US, and for most Arizona residents this means California, a staycation. It undermines the very reason for vacationing. To vacate. Even if it involves going to Scottsdale and holing up in the Scottsdale Princess Resort for a few days away from it all, it is still a vacation. After all, Germans often come here on vacation.

Who is to say that whenever we get away from the routine it can't be classified as a vacation? I guess the main argument against such classification is that those days when a trip to Fry's Electronics in Tempe is in order would count against the 2-weeks vacation time allotted by employers. Scratch that idea.

So, perhaps using this logic, if it is called a staycation we still have 2-weeks vacation coming to us regardless of how much staycation time we have taken. I'm starting to warm up to the idea.

I think I'll invent a the concept of "straycation." As long as we are inventing words we may as well mutilate the concept as well. A straycation (now I'm just too lazy to use quotes) has the following rules:
1. Set amount of time away
2. No set destination
3. Random amount of gasoline in the car
4. Drive. Exit when you want, turn when you want, drive some more.
5. When the "Low Fuel" indicator light illuminates, stay there.
6. Repeat until arriving somewhere enjoyable and distant.
7. Meet and participate in a community event in the stray location.
8. Find a different way home.

Straycations are intended to perpetuate and simulate the stress imposed by daily life. This way we feel comfortable basking in the joy of pain and don't have to suffer the adverse effects of time off.

What's the use of going to work when you just have to turn around and go back on vacation?